Some translations of Type-Moon’s April Fools Joke.

I’d been planning this for a while anyway…

zomggggg

Before anything, I didn’t translate these, I am only responsible for editing (read: inserting text) and the translations are courtesy of an anon from the TM imageboard.

Edit: Added in 2 names I missed.

SPOILERS FOR THE KARA NO KYOUKAI MIRAI FUKUIN NOVEL FOLLOW. TREAD LIGHTLY OR NOT AT ALL.

I guess I really am a bored soul at times…ehehe~

1. Neko Arc CHAOS Evolution

necoarcevosyn

A parody of the obvious. It’s even in the title.

This would have been far superior to DragonBall Evolution all the way down to the director’s Neko Arc’s comments.

2. Sensha Otoko (Tank Man)

tankman

A parody of Densha Otoko, although this time it stars Waver Velvet and Iskandar as the girl (this is a sort of in-joke, Waver is constantly portrayed as somewhat feminine) and “Otaku” respectively.

3. Kara no Kyoukai – Mirai Fukuin –Recalled out Summer-

miraifukuinfixed

Okay this one isn’t actually a parody of anything. It’s actually renown as the “8th” chapter of Kara no Kyoukai, a bridge connecting the past and future events of Kara no Kyoukai.

The new characters in Mirai Fukuin include:

  • Seo Shizune

A girl who can see the future through prediction.

  • Merka Kuramitsu

The antagonist of this story who can calculate future events.

The story takes place when Mikiya meets Shizune, who was trying to save a man from dying by slightly altering the events around him that would proceed to his death. Mikiya then takes her to a cafe where Shizune says that what she sees is a curse, a curse where she can see the deaths of people.

Mikiya tries to explain that the future isn’t something to hate or be feared, much to Shizune’s ire, who then condemns him for making such comments when he barely even knows her.

Mikiya goes on to say that he too can predict the future. To do so, he lets Shizune order something at the cafe (pie i think) and then tells Shizune he knows what’s going to be served to her even though he can’t see it based upon information he can gather.

Kuramitsu however, can actually obtain vision of the future. The only drawback is that when he obtains this vision, he can also see the steps that MUST be taken to reach this future. I’m not too sure about this, but I think the reason he wanted to kill Shiki was because he didn’t couldn’t forsee her appearing in any of his visions.

Touko goes on to elaborate there are two more types of future perception. One is a sixth sense (a gut feeling) which Shiki supposedly possesses. The fourth and supposedly rarest, is a glimpse of events to come that can be changed, depending on how one lives his life (think of it as routes in a visual novel, the route you go down is dead set and there, but you could just as easily go down another and render that other route void) from certain points on. The only person Touko mentions who has this ability is an oracle who uses this ability to help others change their life.

He meets Shiki twice I think, and in their last encounter Shiki manages to kill Kuramitsu’s vision of the future. This is because the vision of the future he obtains is so set and defined that Shiki can see it’s lines of death and end its existence.

At the very end of the book, a special chapter links the past and future of Kara no Kyoukai by showing Kuramitsu (i think?) meet a girl who is the daughter of a Yakuza (or Yakuza-like) boss. The girl’s name is revealed to be Ryougi Mana and the boss Shiki. The husband of course, is Mikiya.

Disclaimer: I only randomly gathered this info from places like the beast’s lair and other assorted internet corners. I may be wrong, so feel free to correct me.

4. Prisoner Sakura – The New Personal Hell-

sakurashankredemption

Based off the Shawshank redemption. Awesome film if I do say so myself.

But casting Satsuki as the villainous warden? 13/10.

5. Kill Ciel

killciel

A parody of Kill Bill. Of course Neko Arc’s out for blood for a much less…serious reason.

6. Neko Arc-su FINAL WARS.

finalwarz

I REALLY didn’t know wtf this was trying to parody until I saw this.

Well, it could have been worse…like Ultraman or something.

7. Japunika Assasin Notebook – The Last Name –

lastname

Parody of Death Note – The Last Name –, albeit much lamer. It says that 100 days of your lifespan will be gone if your name is written once. Wow…

8. Blooming Sakura Romance -Hottie Paradise-

ikemenparadise

Parody of some live-action drama of Hana Kimi.

Okay that’s all that actually got translated. From here on, it’s just like…matching movie/show to parody.

9. いぬふぇいと ―DooGSDAY―

dogfight-dogsday

A parody of Doomsday (2008), directed by Neil Marshall…ew.

10. レジェンド・オブ・ロジウラ 鉛の錬金術師

alchemist

A parody of Hagane no Renkinjutsushi or more popularly known as FullMetal Alchemist. Apparently it’s also a parody of the legend of zorro which sucked.

11. 完全なるシエル

cielcurryrape

At first I though it was trying to parody the Blair Witch Project, but apparently it parodies this.

12.  不思議惑星アン・サ・ラ

bazettandavenger

A parody of…Kin Dza Dza? That old parody film about the dystopian lifestyle of citizens of the Soviet Union in the 1980s?

13. I AM MAKI-JI

foolareyou

A parody of the old post-apocalyptic classic “I AM LEGEND“. Presumably trying to parody the latest of the films because Maki is the star of this particular one and Will Smith was the star of the actual ’07 film.

I’ll leave you to think about why this is so to yourselves.

15. 人形仕掛けのオレンジ/Dollswork Orange

dollsworkorange

Both a parody and a play on the name of the classic novel and film A Clockwork Orange.

16. 当主刑事劇場版

tohnodetective

A parody of Fugoh Keiji. The illustrator is also, coincidentally, SIMOSI, one I’m a HUGE fan of.

17. 超食少女

gaogao

A parody of an old film known as THE GOD COOKER. SERIOUSLY THIS GUY WOULD WIN THE IRON CHEF AND THEN RAPE EVERYONE ON SET.

18. T.C. 藤村大河クロニクルズ

tc

A parody of the Sarah Conner Chronicles. I need to go rent that DVD sometime…

19. 侍探偵両儀式 ~いま、斬りにゆきます~

shiki-idonotknowwhatthisis

A parody of a show called “Ima, kai ni yukimasu“. I’m not too sure what it means when translated, since I have no idea what it’s actually about, but since it doesn’t look like anyone dies i’d say it means “I’m going to go meet (him) now”.

20. ネロカオスイッチ劇場版

nekochaosichi

WTF IS THIS.

21.  世界文化大戦・ザ・ムービー ~輝いてガイア~

lolwhat

I sincerely have no-fucking-clue. Illustrator, however, is this guy – Mashin Echirou. An old favourite of mine because he wrote Mech Seven ~Innocence~ which was fuckin’ hilarious.

22. 映画パピヨンしんちゃん ~眠気を呼ぶ!激辛モジャモジャ王国~

lol

LOLOLOLOL CRAYON SHIN CHAN LOLOLOLOLOL. ROOOOOOOFL.

23. THUMB Fate/Stay Night…

fingerpuppets

HOLY SHIT THUMBTANIC IS THE GREATEST THING IN THE WORLD. SHOULD HAVE WON MORE AWARDS THAN THAT SHIT SHOW TITANIC.

24. 釣りフェチ三平

lancerlol

Actually a parody of this. It’s also a play on one of Lancer’s hobbies in Fate/Hollow Ataraxia (IIRC that is a screenshot from the game itself). Fishing is also a great form of stress release, just as an fyi.

Thanks to Seasons of Change for helping me ID the parodies!

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